Making sense

Anne Lamott, on writing ...

"We are a species that needs and wants to understand who we are. Sheep lice do not seem to share this longing, which is one reason why they write so little. But we do. We have so much we want to say and figure out.”

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Small delights ...

Although French poet and essayist Charles Baudelaire was a bit of a man-whore and died of syphilis at the age of 46 (my current year), I am impressed with this quote, circa 18-something: "A multitude of small delights constitutes happiness."
Because I agree with the statement. Because I appreciate its simplicity.
Look: Short of winning PowerBall, I am never going to be fabulously wealthy and have the financial wherewithal to order scads of fresh flowers daily (i.e. Sir Elton John). I am not going to employ a live-in domestic helper (no space for her in the house; no space for her in the banking account), which means all my life I will battle the dusting ritual (detested), the toilet scrubbing routine (ick), the daily vaccuming (moderately soothing). And then consider the countless dishwasher loadings and unloadings, the endless trips to the grocery, the cleaning of the refrigerator, the cooking of the food, the cleaning of the stovetop, the constantCONstantCONSTANT housekeeping involved in living and breathing and eating and bathing.
But I can and will and MUST find happiness in a multitude of small delights: fresh sheets on the bed, a steaming cup of morning coffee, the metronomic heartbeat of ticking clocks in an otherwise silent household.
You know what little experiences bring you happiness: a sharpened pencil (J.B.), breakfast at midnight (B.B.), falling leaves (C.W.), old phones (J.J.S.), Dunkin Donut coffee (K.M.D.), the sound of children laughing (J.M.-H.)
You know, the little things that help us get through the big things.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Rainy Day Cold

Home today. Sick. Cough with cold, as Forrest Gump would say. Also, it's Columbus Day, and school is out for the kids. Hubby is home, too, only he's been tinkering in the garage for the better part of the day.
I've been in the chair, alternately checking FB and reading through the Sunday paper and several periodicals ("St. Anthony Messenger" and "Instructor" ~ two pubs that represent who I am, I suppose: A Catholic and an Educator.)
I've been subbing this year. Nineteen days, I believe. Don't have any pre-arranged dates this week, but I know the phone will ring incessantly starting at 5:30 a.m.
Still not writing. Outlining a tentative piece: "One Hundred Dollars, One Hundred Days" ~
detailing the life of a sub. I had a strong start, but like most things in my life, I start wholeheartedly and then ... stop, suddenly or with dramatic cessation.
Recently I was diagnosed with ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder). Makes sense to me. Explains my starts and stops, my inattention to Things Around Me, my indecisiveness, my inability to sit anywhere without shaking my leg.
It's a start, the knowing. As Oprah says, "Once we know better, we do better."
Yesterday I signed up for Dr. Oz's "Transformation Nation." Goal: Lose 50 pounds by my August birthday.
Done that before, the goal setting. How to finish what I start?